won't you love me too. it's as simple as that ♥

♥ Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Do you remember me?
Or how to say my name?
Do you remember when we were friends

Swoon this is the same old blood rush with a new touch
I am safe, quaint and eloquent
But my bottom lip along with the top one too
Is chapped and it's all thanks to you
We all wet our lips to prepare for the kiss
But it never came
And we all wet our lips to prepare for the kiss
It was but a game
You have a moan all of your own
And I can feel it down to the bone
You have a moan all of your own
And I can feel it down to the bone
(The bone, the bone)
You trained these lips when they were champs
And now they're itchin' for a comeback
So come back
It's a shame that your claim to fame
Hangs on someone else's name
So come back
Such a task and this is such a blast
And such a task
And such a task and this is such a blast
And all that jazz
You have a moan all of your own
And I can feel it down to the bone
You have a moan all of your own
And I can feel it down to the bone
You have a dangerous face and illegal taste
And that strap is fallen on that shoulder blade
Be patient
Behave
You have a dangerous face and illegal taste
And that strap is fallen on that shoulder blade
Be patient
Behave
You have a dangerous face and illegal taste
And that strap is fallen on that shoulder blade
Be patient
Behave
You trained these lips when they were champs
And now they're itchin' for a comeback
You have a moan all of your own
And I can feel it down to the bone
You have a moan all of your own
And I can feel it down to the bone

MOAN by CUTE IS WHAT WE AIM FOR

i bet the past few posts made me sound like some fucked up lame girl.

and i call myself stupid.
which i think i am.

and then people will tell me,
"cheer up, emo kid"

and im not even emo.
im laughing.
laughing at myself.
cos this is the best new year ever!
im serious.

damn,
im hooked onto cute is what we aim for!

next week....
its a special week for me.
and thanks to my few close friends who are trying to make it special for me.
i really appreciate it.

SOMEONE MAKE ME SMILE PLEASE?

i guess i kinda got a friend back,
but i lost another friend again.
sheesh,
why cant my friends keep by my side.
am i that horrible?

SHEESH.

anyway, i did have a fun time yesterday.
my sister and i took damn alot of retarded photos.
HAHA.

HIP HIP HOORAY!

heartshape <3

pretty act cute eh

my face is like, damn red.
I LOVE DADDY <3>

toodles (:

take me back to the age of innocence.

i don't break hearts.

♥ MEL

9:49 PM

♥ Monday, December 29, 2008

Somebody get me off this lonely sad parade

Somewhere between an empty feeling and the worst one that you know
But i am saving every photograph of you
So every lie i live i see the truth

No sir, well I don't wanna be the blame, not anymore
It's your turn, so take a seat we're settling the final score
And why do we like to hurt, so much?
I can't decide
You have made it harder just to go on
And why, all the possibilities where I was wrong
That's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa
That's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa
I drowned out all my sense with the sound of its beating
And that's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa
I wonder, how am I supposed to feel when you're not here
Cause I burned every bridge I ever built when you were here
I still try holding onto silly things, I never learn
Oh why, all the possibilities I'm sure you've heard
That's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa
That's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa
I drowned out all my sense with the sound of its beating (beating)
And that's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa
Hey, make your way to me, to me
And I'll always be just so inviting
If I ever start to think straight
This heart will start a riot in me
Let's start, start, hey!
Why do we like to hurt so much?
Oh why do we like to hurt so much?
That's what you get when you let your heart win!
Whoa
That's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa
That's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa
Now I can't trust myself with anything but this
And that's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa

THATS WHAT YOU GET by PARAMORE

today has been a dull day.
didnt do much.
but i mastered ironing =D
and i finally mastered ironing men's clothing!
heehee (:
im feeling happier today (:
and i guess thats really good (:
IM LOOKING FORWARD TO 2009! =D

jetzt verstehe ich schließlich die Bedeutung von "ich warte dich, aber ich kann nicht für immer warten"
es verletzt soviel jedes Mal wenn ich an dich denke.
ich möchte zu denken stoppen, aber ich kann nicht mich steuern.
ich halte, dumm mich anzurufen, aber ich weiß nicht warum im noch blogging über dieses.
ich kenne nicht, wenn du ernst bist, oder wenn du mich als Ersatz behandelst.
ich bin verwirrt.
du erhieltest mich verwirrtest.
ich möchte nicht zweites Bestes sein.
niemand wünscht zu irgendwie.
ich hoffe, du verstehst, dass was hoffen im glaubend, ich, tadelst du mich nicht.
und ich hoffe, dass du mich nicht weiter verletzt.
mein Herz nicht weiter brechen, bitte.
ich verfehle dich, soviel
ich weiß, du mir keine Versprechungen ließest, aber ich wirklich hoffe, dass du einem Gedanken für mich ersparst.
bitte.

toodles (:

my funeral in the summer sun,
so beautiful for something so sad
[will i even be missed?]

♥ MEL

4:53 AM

♥ Saturday, December 27, 2008

I miss the lips that make me fly

All I ever wanted
Was to be at your service
But now I'm alone
'Cause you were here and you're gone
And all I ever wanted
Was to feel I had a purpose
But now it's all gone.
But if you could give me
Just one love
Just one life
Just one chance to believe in mine
Just one loveJust one life.
You bleed for me
And I didn't get to notice you
Now I'm stuck out on a line
Yeah, yeah
You bleed for me
I didn't get to be with you
Now you're stuck in my mind.
All I ever wanted was to be what you needed
Something so strong
It could never be wrong
And all I can promise
Is to say what I'm feelin'
We've made it so long.
But if you could give me
Just one love
Just one life
Just one chance to believe in mine
Just one love
Just one life.
You bleed for me
And I didn't get to notice you
(Bleed for me)
Now I'm stuck out on a line
Yeah, yeah
(Would you?)
You bleed for me
I didn't get to be with you
(Bleed for me)
Now you're stuck in my mind.
Just one love in my life.
(Would you?)
You bleed for me
And I didn't get to notice you
(Bleed for me)
Now I'm stuck out on a line
Yeah, yeah
(Would you?)
You bleed for me
I didn't get to be with you
(Bleed for me)
Now you're stuck in my mind.
Bleed for me
Why won't you?
Bleed for me
Why won't you?
Bleed for me.
Just one love in my life.
Bleed for me
Why won't you?
Bleed for me
Why won't you?
Bleed for me.
Just one love in my life.

BLEED FOR ME by SALIVA

turning lesbian wont solve anything.
being emo wont solve anything.
drinking wont solve anything.
complaining wont solve anything.
thinking alot wont solve anything.
hating myself wont solve anything.
crying wont solve anything.
cooping myself up at home wont solve anything.
staring at my handphone wallpaper wont solve anything.
waiting for time to pass wont solve anything.
looking down and forlorn wont solve anything.

我来不及改变结局
这是我自导自演的悲剧
是你 ...是我..只能怪自己...

dear lord,
i really hope you hear me....

♥ MEL

4:35 AM

♥ Friday, December 26, 2008

Close your beautiful mouth,
Shut the fuck up

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared
After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here
So if you're asking me
I want you to know
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that i've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed
Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shared what i made
I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you
So if you're asking me
I want you to know
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that i've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed
Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
Forgetting all the hurt inside you learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed
Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
Forgetting all the hurt inside you learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are

LEAVE OUT ALL THE REST by LINKIN PARK

today i had a blast with my best friends.
i've got a new obsession.
and its a guy again.
EDWARD CULLEN.
that face.
it cant get off my mind.

and i didnt know it took half an hour of a bus ride to get to AMK from my house busstop.
WOW.
ohkayye ._.
so i left the house 45mins in advance.
and then i reached so early.
and i was hoping stacey wouldnt be that late.
thankfully,
i survived.
thanks to reuben,
who kept texting me.
its always nice talking to reuben cos he always makes me laugh.

TWILIGHT WAS AWESOME.
i loved it so much.
though i was shivering.
(i didnt bring my sweater! ): mehh! )

but after that, i was fine.
cos we walked outside.
where the sun was so glaring.
then we met reuben at macs,
where i bought my burger.
i was the only one eating.
i looked like some glutton!
but hey,
at least im eating.
and im not anorexic anymore.
i wanna gain back the 3kg i lost okay!

i had fun playing pool with my two best friends today.
SO FUN.
i took photos.
then the stupid camera had flash.
and some uncle ask me turn off flash.
then reuben call me flasher xD
heh,
and i remember on tuesday,
stacey called me FLASHER MEL.
wah,
sheesh.
i dont want be flasher larh!

i took about 3 photos.
and im not gonna post them here.
cos not very glam.
and its not that i took pervert photos of reuben and dont dare post.
i did not take any perverse photos at all.

and then,
i went novena to hitch a ride from my mummy.
thank god,
today my luck not bad.
heh.

anyway,
new year coming.
2009.
im not gonna say 'woohoo' cos i dont really look forward to it.
but well,
i got some new year resolutions.
and here goes:

1. I AM GOING TO BE NICE.
delete the crazy, weird, insane, irritating, stupid, annoying, loser-ish, low confidence, low self esteem, egoistic, sarcastic, mean mel.
i shall emerge as a beautiful butterfly.
and attract attention as an elegant princess
okay, i was kidding about the butterfly and princess part.
but i just wanna lead a simple life.
be nice to everyone, be helpful.
show my kind side.
and beauty doesnt grow,
so i cant help if im forever ugly (:
SHIT.

2. I AM GOING TO WORK HARD.
study hard.
work hard.
make these resolutions come true.
im not going to disappoint people.
im not going to piss people off.

3. I WANT A SIMPLE LIFE.
okay,
not the paris hilton kinda simple life.
but i just wanna focus on studies,
find someone who loves me for who i am and i can love,
be filial to my parents,
remove burdens from people as much as possible,
stop getting into complicated relationships,
stop pissing my friends off with my sarcasm,
stop losing friends,
keeping in touch with all my friends and staying close to them.

and reply to tags:
REUBEN-- i only got boy friends meh? ._. hahahaha, i very nice. got all kinds of friends (:
KAYWEI-- i guess you didnt read the posts eh? x=

and messages for my best friends (alphabetical order):
IAN- you're missed like crazy! OMG. COME BACK SOON! i miss you cheering me up man!
LYDIA- thanks for always being a listening ear and giving me awesome advice. I LOVE YOU.
REUBEN- you always entertain me without fail. and im glad to have you as a best friend (:
STACEY- i love your letter (: and i love you too (: thanks for always being here for me (:

and heres our lovely photo we took today!

my shirt reads "BOYS ARE STUPID THROW ROCKS AT THEM" =D

I LOVE MY BEST FRIENDS (:

cos when i die, i will die loving you

♥ MEL

4:49 AM

♥ Thursday, December 25, 2008

Baby you're the only thing that's been, on my mind

Oh kiss me, like you mean it
Like you miss me

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time
Deep insideIt was a rush, what a rush
Cause the possibility that you would ever feel the same way
About me
It's just too much, just too much
Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know
Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing can go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do
Cause I'm tryin, tryin to walk away
But I know this crush aint goin away
Yeah, yeah yeah yeah
Goin away
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
Has it ever cross your mind
When were hangin, spending time girl,
Are we just friends
Is there more, is there more
See it's a chance we've gotta take
Cause I believe that we can make this into
Something that will last, last forever, forever
Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing can go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do
Cause I'm tryin, tryin to walk away
But I know this crush aint goin away
Yeah, yeah yeah yeah
Goin away
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know
Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing can go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do
Cause I'm tryin, tryin to walk away
But I know this crush aint goin away
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Goin away
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
(Goin away yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing can go
(Goin away yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do

CRUSH by DAVID ARCULETA

terrible headache.
woke up at 12.
lay in bed till 4.
then came online.

heh,
3 and a half bottles of wine.
knock out man.
i should have taken a photo of myself.
my face was so red.
and i was just so fucking pissed with myself.
yeah,
my previous post was written while drunk.

and i normally dont get drunk so easily!

who cares.
anyway,
my head still freaking hurts.
but i cant fall asleep.

and this song 'get back' by demi lovato is stuck in my head.
okay,
i swear it has nothing to do with my current situation.
i was watching camprock today.
then i decided to listen to demi lovato.

and thats the only song i liked (:

i dont feel like blogging actually.
but since i was trying to update my songs,
i decided to just write one post.
i added three new songs.
and they are awesome songs (:
enjoy (:

toodles

♥ MEL

1:51 AM

♥ Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Beautiful eyes,
Beautiful lies.

You change your mind
Like a girl changes clothes
Yeah you,
PMS
Like a bitch
I would know
And you always think
Always speak
Crypticly
I should know
That you're no good for me
Cause you're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in and you're out
You're up and you're down
You're wrong when it's right
It's black and it's white
We fight, we break up
We kiss, we make up
You,
You don't really want to stay, no
You, but you don't really want to go-o
You're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in and you're out
You're up and you're down
We used to be
Just like twins
So in sync
The same energy
Now's a dead battery
Used to laugh bout nothing
Now your plain boring
I should know that you're not gonna change
Cause you're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in and you're out
You're up and you're down
You're wrong when it's right
It's black and it's white
We fight, we break up
We kiss, we make up
You,
You don't really want to stay, no
You, but you don't really want to go-o
You're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in and you're out
You're up and you're down
Someone call the doctor
Got a case of a love bi-polar
Stuck on a roller coaster
Can't get off this ride
You change your mind
Like a girl changes clothes
Cause you're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in and you're out
You're up and you're down
You're wrong when it's right
It's black and it's white
We fight, we break up
We kiss, we make up
You're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in and you're out
You're up and you're down
You're wrong when it's right
It's black and it's white
We fight, we break up
We kiss, we make up
You, you don't really want to stay, no
You, but you don't really want to go-o
You're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in and you're out
You're up and you're down

HOT N COLD by KATY PERRY

damn it.
im sick of everything.
and no one's going to force me to eat.
not that i dont want to,
but i cant.

im really glad my cousin was here today.
to make me laugh.
and tell me funny things.
he listened while i ranted out on alot of nonsense.
and im grateful for that.

i need chocolate.

and i was thinking about why anyone should even like me.
like,
im not very nice.
maybe only to some people. but i guess im rather mean towards the rest.
sheesh ): unintentional!
i say alot of stupid things too.
stupid things that anger and piss people off when i totally didnt intend for that to happen.
im ugly.
i dont have a sense of humour and im probably brainless.

DO YOU EVEN CARE FOR ME?

do people even care for me?

i ask myself that,
over and over again.
until i become emo.
and everything i feel alright again,
i think of those stuff again.

listen hard,
MEL DOES NOT WANT TO BE EMO.
but her current fucking situation is turning into a fucking freakshow.
and im so sorry im using so many vulgarities.
but im really really fucking pissed.

with myself.

im not angry at anyone.
i dont blame anyone.
i just know,
im inferior.
i feel uncared for.

i know some people do care.
but of course,
they care for themselves first.

MEL IS ALWAYS ON THE LAST OF THE LIST.

like right now,
if i was being cared for,
people would be calling me to go down to eat more
cos i only had two fucking mini sausages for dinner.
and thats cos my fucking hatred for myself has caused me to lose my appetite.

I HATE MYSELF.
I HATE MYSELF.
I HATE MYSELF.

then people say,
if you dont love yourself,
people wont love you.

yeah,
maybe thats why the whole world fucking hates me.
thats why im always down on luck.
thats why i dont have anyone to talk RIGHT NOW.
im sick of all these shit.

you steal my heart.
then tear it into half and throw one half at me.
thats what i feel.
i feel like im left hanging with no answer.
the feeling i had last time.
a feeling i really hate.

why do people like to torture me so much.
am i really that fun to hate?

ahh,
im not going to commit suicide.
commiting suicide is dumb.
im not going to cut myself,
like in my foolish past.
im not going to do stupid things.

i've got beer in the fridge and few bottles of wine.
maybe its time to just get drunk.
and stop thinking for the next few days.

BUT I CANT.

goddamn it!
what the fuck is wrong with me.
im so irritated im typing so fast and loudly.
my stupid keyboard is going to spoil.

AND I SWEAR ITS NOT PMS.
pms doesnt make me feel like this.
PMS dont make people hate themselves.

and for fuck's sake,
i repeat to myself constantly.
its christmas,
soon.

do i like christmas?
yes.
then why the fuck am i feeling so screwed up.

i swear,
its nobody's fault.

its all mine.

i hate myself.
and i always will.

this is the fucking third post of the day.
and i dont give a fuck what you think about them.
call me stupid or crazy or emo.
i dont care.
im just tired of living.
each day is a pain.

its my fault.
all my fault.

i blame no one else but myself.

and its time to stuff myself with junk.
junk = rubbish = mel.
heh,
see the link?
im full of rubbish.

I HATE MYSELF

♥ MEL

5:15 AM

♥ Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Last christmas i gave you my heart,
But the very next day you gave it away

I close the door
Like so many times, so many times before
Filmed like a scene on the cutting room floor
I wanna let you walk away tonight
Without a word
I try to sleep, yeah
But the clock is stuck on thoughts of you and me
A thousand more regrets unraveling, ohh
If you were here right now, I swear
I'd tell you this
Baby I don't want to waste another day
Keeping it inside is killing me
'Cause all I ever want, it comes right down to you, to you
I wish that I could find the words to say
Baby I would tell you every time you leave
I'm inconsolable
I climb the walls, yeah
I can see the edge but I can't take the fall, no
I memorized the number
So why can't I make the call?
Maybe 'cause I know you'll always be with me
In the possibility
Baby I don't want to waste another day
Keeping it inside is killing me
Cause all I ever want, it comes right down to you, to you
I wish that I could find the words to say
Baby I would tell you every time you leave
I'm inconsolable
No no no
I don't wanna be like this
I just wanna let you know
Everything that I hold in
Is everything I can't let go
Can't let go, yeah
Cause baby I don't want to waste another day
Keeping it inside is killing me
Cause all I ever want, it comes right down to you, to you
I wish that that I could find the words to say
Baby I would tell you every time you leave
I'm inconsolable
Don't you know it baby
I don't wanna waste another day
I wish that I could find the words to say
Baby I would tell you every time you leave
I'm inconsolable
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah, oh
I'm inconsolable, woah yeah
I'm inconlsolable, yeah

INCONSOLABLE by BACKSTREET BOYS

this post is for you.
and,
this song that describes how i feel now.

when you leave,
im inconsolable.

i guess i should've been more understanding.
i did a stupid thing.

and i know its retarded to blog about all these.
but my blog is really my only avenue of venting.
cos when im feeling this emo,
i cant talk to anyone.
i'll probably just piss them off.
and maybe i just did piss you off.

i woke up today,
waiting for a text.
you said you'd text me.
but i didnt receive anything.

so i texted you.

and i was feeling nervous.
cos i wondered what kind of reply you would give.
i was feeling really guilty about venting on you last night.
well, i lost a friend.
and i asked you a stupid question.
i already apologised.

i should have been more understanding.

give me a chance.
i love you.

♥ MEL

11:53 PM

♥

The type of guy who doesn't see
What he has until she leaves
Don't let me go
Cause without me you know you're lost
Wise up now or pay the cost
Soon you will know

Today is the day
The worst day of my life
You're so content it hurts me
I don't know why
The cost of misery
Is at an all time high
I keep it hidden
Close to the surface in sight
I'm learning to fall
I can't hardly breathe
When I'm going down don't worry about me
Don't try this at home
You said you don't see
I don't want to know that you know,
it should have been me
Could you be with him?
Or was it just a lie?
He doesn't catch you like I do
And you don't know why
You change your clothes and your hair
But I can't change your mind
Oh, I'm uninvited
So unrequited now
I'm learning to fall
I can't hardly breathe
When I'm going down don't worry about me
Don't try this at home
You said you don't see
I don't want to know that you know, it should have been me
Words screaming in my head
Why did you leave?
And I can't stop dreaming
Watching you and him
When it should have been
It should have been me
Today is the day
The worst day of my life
I'm learning to fall
I can't hardly breathe
When I'm going down don't worry about me
Don't try this at home
You said you don't see
I don't want to know that you know, it should have been me
Whoa
(I'm learning to fall, I can't hardly breathe)
(I don't want to know that you know, it should have been me)
Tell me that you know, it should have been me
Whoa
(Don't try this at home, You said you don't see)
I don't want to know that you know, it should've been me
Whoa
(I'm learning to fall, I can't hardly breathe)
(I don't want to know that you know, it should have been me)
Tell me that you know, it should have been me
Whoa
(Don't try this at home, You said you don't see)
I don't want to know that you know, it should've been me

LEARNING TO FALL by BOYS LIKE GIRLS

i should start a band called GIRLS LIKE GIRLS.

i should like girls.
i should turn into a lesbian.
steer clear of all guys.

maybe i should just lock myself up in my room and just suffocate myself with a pillow.
an easy death.
peaceful.

okay.
why the fuck am i talking about dying.
for fuck's sake,
its christmas eve!

anyway,
i miss school.
SCHOOL SCHOOL SCHOOL.

and holidays really suck.
IT SUCKS.

or maybe my life just sucks.
my luck is bad.
everything that happens to me always has an evil.

i havent been an evil person.
i havent done much evil.
so why is all these bad luck falling on me.

HOLIDAYS SUCK.
why do people always have to go overseas?
why must i go overseas?

its always like this,
its like a cycle.
everytime i hang out with an amazing guy and have an amazingly great time,
the next day someone leaves for overseas.
and when both parties are back in singapore,
everything goes downhill.
its happened so many times.
and now its happened again.

DE JA VU.
its just like a de ja vu.
just that each time its someone different.

and i dont wanna lose a friend again.

heh,
anyway.
i was thinking about the word FALL.
i wanted to copy and paste the dictionary meaning.
but go check it out on your own.

actually,
the word fall doesnt mean much.
but the verb phrases are the most interesting.

FALL UPON- to chance upon, come upon
eg. i fell upon an amazing chance but i screwed up.

FALL FOR- to fall in love with; to fall for a trick
eg. i fell for this amazing dude.

FALL OUT- to quarrel or disagree
eg. i fell out with someone cos I WAS STUPID.

FALL DOWN- falling downwards, tripping, stumbling upon an obstacle.
eg. everything was going smoothly until i fell down on a huge mistake i made.

FALL BACK- give way, retreat
eg. please fall back into my life again

ITS CHRISTMAS TOMORROW.
and i miss my friends who are flying off today.
AHMA! i wish you were here to cheer me up like you did last night.... ):
hope you have fun in australia (:

WHITNEY! so clever! you managed to find my blog! hehheh, think i dunno ah....
you saw on my facebook right! (:

my blog posts are always so long....

TOODLES

i'll be all you need and more

♥ MEL

9:45 PM

♥

Intoxicate me
I’m a lush
Stop you’re making me blush

I don’t think you know
I’m checking you
So hot, so hot
Wonder if you know
You're on my radar

Interesting sense of style
Ten million dollar smile
Think I can handle that

Alright, that's it, I've had enough, I'm on my way to you
It's nauseating and I'm sick of waiting
for all these pointless calls to go through
But no, I'm not a skeptic anymore
At last I see what all of this ridiculous hard work is for
The moisture in the air is begging for release
and the memory of your stare is raining down on me
Hypothetically if you were point A
and theoretically if I was point B,
we would be, we would be frantically melting
into one massive point
that could overcome anything
Constantly you're working through the mileage in my head
Oh, I'm calculating, yes I'm sick of waiting
How many hours until I reach your bed?
But no, I'm not a skeptic anymore
At last I see what all of this ridiculous hard work is for
The moisture in the air is begging for release
and the memory of your stare is raining down on me
Hypothetically if you were point A
and theoretically if I was point B,
we would be, we would be frantically melting
into one massive point
that could overcome anything
My faith in you could move these mountains I am driving through
It's times like these when I wish I could teleport to you
'cause then we wouldn't have an issue
We're cleverly, strategically
challenging our fright and insecurities,
and never seem to want to leave
Hypothetically if you were point A
and theoretically if I was point B,
we would be, we would be frantically melting
into one massive point
that could overcome anything
Yeah, we would be, we would be frantically melting
into one massive point
that could overcome anything

TELEPORT A & B by THE SPILL CANVAS

today,
there are actually two songs stuck in my head.

because im filled with two emotions today.
HAPPY and SAD.

two common emotions.
but i guess,
sometimes they really make you think.
think about life.

okay,
this is SO not going to be an emo post.

hmm,
i shall begin with the sad.

sometimes in life,
you make friends.
friends that you wanna keep.
but sometimes,
things get complicated.
more feelings are involved.
then you lose your friend.
and what if you like your friend?
as in really like,
but as a friend.
its damn heart pain right?
sheesh,
i guess i lost a friend today.
and im feeling quite unhappy about it.

i apologise profusely to that friend,
whom i've probably hurt.
im really sorry that things turned out this way.

not to forget,
feel people who are important to me are going overseas.
so im stuck in singapore.
alone and bored.
but its alright,
life will go on.
i'll try not to emo in loneliness.
*shrugs*

In muddy grass we stand side by side
with our knuckles interlocked
Black dresses flood the cemetery
in this cliche tragedy
Just do as you're instructed and....
Take this razor and cut your palms
I'll do the same until a river of crimson begins to flow
Now drip your ruby red over the casket
A funeral for my once loved youth
My secret is fatally gorgeous
I'd die for you
But in this Bonnie and Clyde kind of romance
tell me what would you do?
My secret is fatally gorgeous
I'd die for you
But when your precious life is at stake
tell me would you die for me too?
The quivering liquids in your stomach
will eat away at the bad habits that have made you
a real character in the story of your now distant life
Goodnight and goodbye, quickly
In gentle greens we stand side by side
with your head buried in my chest
Black veils send me shivering
The fear that part of me is dying
Just do as you're instructed and....
Take this razor and cut your palms
I'll do the same until a river of crimson begins to flow
Now drip your ruby red over the casket
A funeral for my once loved youth
My secret is fatally gorgeous
I'd die for you
But in this Bonnie and Clyde kind of romance
tell me what would you do?
My secret is fatally gorgeous
I'd die for you
But when your precious life is at stake
tell me would you die for me too?
The quivering liquids in your stomach
will eat away at the bad habits that have made you
a real character in the story of your now distant life
Goodnight and goodbye, quickly, quickly
Goodbyes are said and roses thrown
And the crowd starts to weep
But the irony of the story is when I fell to my knees
and began clawing at the dirt in front of the tombstone
of my bashful childhood
With you by my side, you're screaming at the
top of your lungs, "let it go"
And I'm screaming at the top of my lungs
"The ceremony was not proper, there was not enough people,
and who picked the music?
Those melodies almost made me physically sick"
My secret is fatally gorgeous
I'd die for you
But in this Bonnie and Clyde kind of romance
tell me what would you do?
My secret is fatally gorgeous
I'd die for you
But when your precious life is at stake
tell me would you die for me too?
The quivering liquids in your stomach
will eat away at the bad habits that have made you
a real character in the story of your now distant life
Goodnight and goodbye, quickly
Goodnight and goodbye, quickly

BLACK DRESSES by THE SPILL CANVAS

its a really emo song.
but its nice.
and im not supposed to be emo,
but i cant help.
i feel like crying.
i think im stupid.
i feel really disappointed with myself.
but i'll try to evict those thoughts ASAP

anyway,
about the happy.

now wipe away sad face.
and happy face appears.

i had a great day today.
i FINALLY watched Yes Man.
and i learnt a moral from the story.
dont say yes to everything.
but somethings i dont regret saying yes (:
those who know, good for you (:

and i owe someone 7dollars for the movie.
but thanks for making today fun (:

well,
i guess happy doesnt beat the sadness.
cos it seems like the sad section was longer than the happy section.
sheesh.

You're captivating while evading
All the questions I have for you like,
"What exactly makes you tick?"
When the guilt sets in tell me
What are we going to do?
Your tongue is wet with a top secret passion
I hope I am the cause of it
I'll navigate this unsturdy vessel
Filled with a soft sea of pillows and blankets
And I fight the urge to explore
The vastness of your curves I adore
You know I, I hate you
No, I hate you more
You know I, I love you
No, I love you more
Yes, it's true
You've brainwashed me and now I'm more confused
I still somehow hope I end up with you
Yes, it's true
I romanticize every single thing I do
Especially when it comes to you
I've sunken in the quicksands of love
And I don't want you to rescue me
Screw what my supposed friends think
It's obvious they reek of jealousy
It's obvious they reek of jealousy
And I fight the urge to explore
The vastness of your curves I adore
You know I, I hate you
No, I hate you more
You know I, I love you
No, I love you more
Yes, it's true
You've brainwashed me and now I'm more confused
I still somehow hope I end up with you
Yes, it's true
I romanticize every single thing I do
Especially when it comes to you
I hope to God I mean a little more then the sounds that escape your tired 4 A.M. lips
And oh-how I wish I meant a little more then a symphony of heavy breathing and the friction of hips
Yes, it's true
You've brainwashed me and now I'm more confused
I still somehow hope I end up with you
Yes, it's true
I romanticize every single thing I do
Especially when it comes to you

HIMERUS AND EROS by THE SPILL CANVAS

gee, i guess the spill canvas is quite emo eh.
ahh wells,
lets look forward to CHRISTMAS CHRISTMAS CHRISTMAS!

PRESENTS.
CHOCOLATES.
PEOPLE.
MUSIC.
FOOD.
ALCOHOL.

wow, its the great christmas party tomorrow.
and im not really looking forward to it.
time needs to pass slower.
time is moving too fast.
sheesh,
when can time stop for me?

and what the fuck,
im sounding all emo again?

i was supposed to watch the little nonya on tv today,
but im totally not in the mood.
i just wanna vent all these out.

i really hate to end today like this.
someone please save me.

im sorry to the few people i've promised not to feel emo and troubled.
i cant help it.
even though i had an absolutely fun time outside today,
a single text has spoilt my mood.
completely.

alright.
enough of this bullshit.

replies to tags:
REUBEN-- badminton you need one hand to hold raquet and the other to hold shuttlecock mah.
BILLY-- i know who you are (: and after watching yes man, you should know that i cant say yes to everything (:

heh,
have fun people (:

TOODLES!

my smile still hasnt appeared ):

♥ MEL

4:25 AM

♥ Sunday, December 21, 2008

Soft kiss and wine
What a pretty friend of mine
We’re finally intertwined
Nervous and shy
For the moment we will come
Alive
Tonight
Secret valentine

We’ll write a song
That turns out the lights
When both boy and girl start suddenly shaking inside
Don’t waste your time
Speed up your breathing
Just close your eyes
We’ll hope it’s not for nothing at all

Hey, hey!
Hey, hey!
Sometimes I feel like everybody's got a problem
Sometimes I feel like nobody wants to solve them
I know that people say we're never gonna make it
But I know we're gonna get through this
(Close your eyes and please don't let me go)
Don't, don't, don't, don't let me go now
(Close your eyes, don't let me let you go)
Don't, don't, don't...
Take my hand tonight
Let's not think about tomorrow
Take my hand tonight
We could find some place to go
Cause our hearts are locked forever
And our love will never die
Take my hand tonight
One last time
Hey, hey!
Hey, hey!
The city sleeps and we're lost in the moment
Another kiss says we're lying on the pavement
If they could see us they would tell us that we're crazy
But I know they just don't understand
(Close your eyes and please don't let me go)
Don't, don't, don't, don't let me go now
(Close your eyes, don't let me let you go)
Don't, don't, don't...
Take my hand tonight
Let's not think about tomorrow
Take my hand tonight
We could find some place to go
Cause our hearts are locked forever
And our love will never die
Take my hand tonight
One last time
Hey, hey!
Hey, hey!
Hey, hey!
The raindrops, the tears keep falling
I see your face and it keeps me going
If I get lost your light's gonna guide me
And I know that you can take me home
You can take me home
Take my hand tonight
Let's not think about tomorrow
Take my hand tonight
We can find some place to go
Cause our hearts are locked forever
And our love will never die
Take my hand tonight
One last time
Take my hand tonight
Let's not think about tomorrow
Take my hand tonight
We could find some place to go
(find some place to go)
Cause our hearts are locked forever
And our love will never die
(love will never die)
Take my hand tonight
One last time

TAKE MY HAND by SIMPLE PLAN

today is AVRIL LAVIGNE and SIMPLE PLAN day.

i hardly left my bed at all today.
apart from meals, piano practice and a trip to the park.

and my piano playing has improved!
i spent about 20mins improving my exam pieces.
cos the goddamned exam fee costs three freaking hundred dollars.
i dont wanna waste my parents' money.
so im working towards a distinction (:
but its hard.
i'll be happy just to pass, really.

i suddenly recalled my piano dream i used to have last time.
it started when i was in primary school....
i was to take music 'O' levels,
continue music studies overseas,
and open my music school.
a school of my own.
to spread the love for music.
sounds awesome, doesnt it?
but that dream was shattered because of my school.
i got through the audition.
but my school didnt offer the course in school so i'd have to go to other schools.
and due to that inconvenience,
my parents sugggested i just dropped.
and there,
my dreams crashed.
my piano teacher was my favourite teacher.
she inspired me.
she helped me to appreciate music.
and love music.
and the nicest part of all,
shes been teaching me piano since i was in kindergarten (:
isnt that so fabulous? (:

once the music dream was over and i got over it,
i fell in love with drums.
the instrument that really lets me vent.
piano and drums go really well together (:

then,
i read this sidney sheldon book entitled 'the stars shine down'.
its my favourite book.
i went into this craze about marrying a pianist.
its crazy.
i still wanna marry a concert pianist.
but lets be realistic,
its almost impossible.
the chances are probably 0.01% only.

sheesh,
im blabbering on and on as usual....

and i still havent mastered one-hand badminton.
talking on the phone while playing badminton sure is tiring.
but im no fan of badminton anyway.
its makes me tired.
and im seriously turning into some couch potato already!
so easily tired.
(my dear ahma, if you're reading this,
dont start laughing and calling me an ahgong
"cos old people get tired easily" <-- quote by you )

simple plan is really cool (:
im still listening to them while typing this blog post now (:
highly recommended (:

im feeling happy : D
20 days to THE GREAT's birthday : D
get the presents ready (:

TOODLESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS =D

♥ MEL

4:00 AM